A Daughter’s Journey With Her Dad’s Alzheimer’s

It is with a heavy heart that I start this post.

Yesterday my husband and I went over to my Dad’s as he was being seen by a geriatric specialist. This is an ongoing event. So the Dr. came and did his mini mental testing. My Dad surprising did okay, better than in the past. When the Dr. went on to ask some questions related to reasoning, my Dad did not so great in that aspect.

Dr. N. proceeded to ask my Dad if he felt that he should be moving into community care. My Dad replied ‘No”. When asked what he would do, once my husband and I sell our home, which is a future plan, and leave the province, My Dad said he would deal with that when he had to but not at this point. Dr. N. did advise him that plans don’t happen overnight and that my Dad should do some serious thinking of his future.

Dr. N. is aware that it is my husband and myself who assist my Dad and that he has no other supports in place. My father has refused meals on wheels, even just to give them a try. One reason was he did not want his main meal to be delivered at noon. Plus I suspect that he would not like to answer his door several times a week. To say that my Dad is not social is an understatement.

Dr. N. is also aware that my father has refused Home Care for bathing and also refused to have a Rx filled for medication that could perhaps help him with his Alzheimer’s. It was recommended on a trail basis but……. So after checking blood pressure, my Dad’s mobility, and a few other items, that was the end of the visit. Dr. N. told Dad that he would be back again to check on him in a few months time.

I stepped outside to speak to the Dr. He stated that Dad is “community care” needs but actually no longer qualifies for “community care” at this point because my Dad would not go willingly into that type of care. Therefore, he would have to go into long term care, and be on a “locked unit”. That type of unit I am all too familiar with as that is where I currently work.

As I mentioned in my first post, I work a government facility, long term care, on the dementia unit which is a locked unit. I love my work, enjoy my co-workers and the residents that I care for. However, dealing with my Dad on top of that, becomes too much, to say the least.

However there was more to the discussion which I shall leave until another post. I have some research to do and also need to reconnect with Home Care for further assistance. Plus my brother and his girlfriend are staying here at Easter so we need to talk. And then continue that conversation with my sister in Ottawa. This situation is more complicated that I thought it would be. I was hoping that Dad would grudging agree to community care and it would “just” entail finding a spot in a place that I have in mind and arranging a move. But as my mother used to say, “you know what thought did, thought thought wrong” or something to that nature. So the plot has thickened.

Today I spent a quiet day at home and decided to do some spring cleaning in the kitchen. Maybe as I continue to spring clean, spring will actually come. Although more snow is in the forecast for part of the province. I truly believe 16 feet plus is more than enough for this winter!

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