A Daughter’s Journey With Her Dad’s Alzheimers

Hello. I’m hoping that this post will show on Facebook. The last one didn’t and I don’t know why.

Last week was another busy one. Today I was over at Dad’s returning more laundry. Had picked some up on Wednesday. Some of the bedding that I took had to go back that night. WalMart carries Purity products, cookies and such, which he likes so dropped off an assortment of those as well.

Discovered last week that he has cataract surgery scheduled for early July. This will be the “second” eye so that will be a blessing. With my involvement as care taking ending the end of June, my brother will now has this on his plate so to speak. Dad also needs blood work and a chest X-ray since it has been a year. Another item for the list! A visit to his family Doctor is in order.

Last week I was pleased to get notification on an available bed which would meet Dad’s needs. I was thrilled although moving him in June was earlier than expected. Hubby and I checked out the facility after my 12 hour shift. Within 24 hours of me accepting the offered bed, I had to decline the offer. A 3-way phone call with brother #1 and sister #2 that evening meant finding out the my sister couldn’t come which I already knew. My brother wouldn’t come which was a bit of a surprise. So moving day is not happening next week. Hubby has a medical test next week, which we found out about on the same day as the bed offer, which meant he would not be able to help.

Since my father is unaware that he will be moving and I would be the one actually taking him in a vehicle once having told him the proposed plan, I quickly realized that a move in June would not happen. Some of my feelings were anger and frustration and resentment. However, I’m not an only child. Some of my siblings have been weighing in on Dad’s future. Factors needed to be considered. Some reasons for Dad not moving yet are “too soon”, wanting to give him “the summer” as well as further preparation i.e. having a conversation with him this summer about his immediate future.

Home Care and his geriatrician see him as needing to move. This is based on his age, his dementia, and his declining health as well as the fact that he lives alone with a very limited support system. Home Care nurse will visit him this coming week for an further assessment. The geriatrician will be seeing him later this month or next depending on how his schedule fills up.

I’m still feeling up-to-date with Dad’s caregiving that I do. I still feel that he needs more than I can provide and that he should not continue to live on his own. However, it is harder for me to keep up with the needs. Today in a conversation together, was an opportunity to discuss clothing in terms of his suits. In the past, I’ve taken one to the dry cleaners. However he has another suit that both my sister and I think is a better choice. After a short discussion, i was able to leave with the suit which I will drop off next week. Another item off my mental list.

I’m looking forward to being able to go and visit Dad without added responsibility. Father’s Day is coming and I happened to get his gift today when buying a baby shower gift.

Volunteering at the Alzheimers Walk tomorrow at the registration table. Hubby will walk, along with our two pugs, as a participant. Didn’t take on the task of fundraising this time so will make a personal donation. Hope weather is co-operative.

Thanks for reading. Thanks to friends, family and co-workers for all the support given to me.


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